Samuel
Samuel Anthony migrated to the United States in the Seventies to reunite with his parents, who had migrated ahead of their children. He became a lawful permanent resident shortly afterward. He brother struggled with addiction in his early twenties, and ended up serving time for drug-related offenses. After completing his sentence, Samuel changed the course of his life, found steady work, and reconnected with his daughter. However, in 2019, ICE detained him without any notice and deported him to Sierra Leone, where he lives in exile today.
Samuel 0:47
Samuel Johnson Anthony, and we're speaking from Sierra Leone, West Africa. Freetown, exactly, is the capital city. Today is July 16, 2021. It's a Friday, and on West Africa time is 6:02pm.
Interviewer 01:06
Great. And to begin, can you tell us a little bit about how you came to know about this project or about the organization, Immigrant Defense Project where I work?
Samuel 01:17
I was informed about this project through my sister Samilia Anthony and through Miss Sarah Gilman, who also has a defense project. She's also working on my immigration case, and was able to help me, tell me how you guys were able to do a format on my case and other individuals’ immigration problems.
Interviewer 01:43
Right, um, starting with your family story, can you share some of the reasons why you or your family migrated to the United States from Sierra Leone?
Samuel 01:52
My mom and dad—I was born in Sierra Leone, West Africa. In 1970, my mom and dad married. October 1, 1970. [Gloria Lee] is her maiden name. My mom died April 27, 2021. She's no longer with us. So they married on October 1, 1970. They had my daughter—they had my sister [laughs] prior to them getting married. In 1972, I arrived on July 20th. And from that time, my dad left Freetown, Sierra Leone, in 1972, I believe from what I was told by my mother.
And then, from that point on, my mom followed. Exactly what year I'm not exactly sure. But from my understanding it was strictly for education. And my dad went to— uh came abroad to study and went to America to study abroad to become a… and get his diploma when he went abroad to study—that was the key for that was a reason for going to America.
Later on, uh, me and my sister followed in 1978, me and my sister followed. But my sister, I think, told me I'm not quite sure that we had went before 1978, but I'm not exactly sure. Because when I came to America, I was six years old. So you can imagine that I was young. So I don't really know, dates and timeline, after—from 1972 to 1978. Because I was approximately six years of age when I did arrive to America. We traveled from Great Britain. We went to go visit my dad's sister, and then we came to America. So the migration period, I don't know my parents' intent, but when they brought us over, I guess it would be what every other parents would want for the child to grow up in America—to get a good education, a better way of life—because at that time, Sierra Leone had just got independence, like in April 1961. It just got independence from the UK, from Great Britain.
So it wasn't like they were migrating from a war-torn country. I don't want people to think that at that time, when my parents migrated, it was a war-torn country. It was just leaving one—I guess there was, leaving one colonial—coming from colonial rule. So from leaving colonial rule would be more effective as far as since more opportunity has arrived, so let's go abroad and raise a family of some sort.
Interviewer 05:02
Yeah, so, do you want to talk a little bit about what that adjustment was like from you, from Sierra Leone to wherever? Where did you move in the United States?
Samuel 05:17
Exactly, so this is where—when we, when my sister and I came to America in 1978, we enrolled in Thompson—Strong John Thompson Elementary School, located on 12th Street in Northwest Washington, DC. My parents had resided in Washington DC. So from there, we, uh, I started first grade. My sister started third grade.
Those years, elementary school, was like the hardest I've ever recalled because not fitting in. It was very difficult for me myself to fit in because it was like… to put it bluntly, American’s didn’t take well to immigrants, well, especially black Americans. I grew up—we went to like an African American community. So they didn’t take well to Africans. So we was, me and my sister was bullied, we was ostracized, we was beat up a lot. It was a lot of abuse, we took from our peers, lots of my peers. Because I was the smallest one and I think, and I wanted to be more accepted, and my sister was more of a recluse, she didn't really deal with it. But me being a boy, I went through more of a battle with individuals. So my years in elementary school was quite difficult. So trying to fit in, trying to become one of them, talk like one of them, caused me a lot of difficulties.
And I became more of a victim than anything. I think that traumatized me now that I realized anything that its’ hard for me to find friends and accept people as friends. My trust with people doesn't really, uh, doesn't really fit because of what I've endured during those years. Where I know that people just used me for, and made, made fun of who I was. So I wasn't really accepted. So that kind of always made, made uh something inside me that never really, I never really fully recovered. And those, those things are things that I deal with constantly as even as an adult because knowing that people you think maybe your friend, they not, and that they just using you for what they could, and they really don't like you. So from age six to 12 would be my elementary school period, was very traumatic to me. So it was very hurtful and very, I would call it it developed me into [inaudible] because of how I was just I was just, I was just put it mildly, I was bullied and beaten, and abused by my peers.
“So I was stuck between two areas that I didn’t even fit. I wasn’t an American, and I didn’t think I was African. Because I was trying to become somebody. I was in two worlds that wasn’t accepting me. My parents didn’t understand what I was dealing with. My peers didn’t know who I was, you know they didn’t accept me- they knew I wasn’t an American.”
Interviewer 08:15
Okay, and then do you remember then, what did home mean to you then, at that time? Like, if you could think of yourself in that time, in a community where you weren't accepted? How would you have thought of home?
Samuel 08:35
Well, “home” was difficult because I couldn't tell my parents, or they didn't understand when you explained it them. So this was thing as an adult, I'm still trying to cope with. So when you have parents from a different culture and then when you’re raised, they want you to follow their culture. So when things happen in a different culture and you try to explain, they always blame you for the fault. So this is what I've always endured with my mom and dad and sometimes my sister. It seems like the blame always like what did you do to cause them to do these things to you?
So it wasn't them trying to say well let's try to find out what happened. It was always, well, what did you do? It was always—you know, I don't know if it’s an African thing or culture thing? So home was to me was worse because of the beatings. I got into fights. It wasn't like I had to fight for people not to beat me up again all those things or act a certain way or was seeking attention. You know, the punishments the beatings, worse. So I was stuck between two areas that I didn't even fit. I wasn't an American, and I didn't think I was African. Because I was trying to become somebody. I was in two worlds that wasn't accepting me. My parents didn’t understand what I was dealing with. My peers didn't know who I was, you know they didn’t accept me- they knew I wasn’t an American.
So it was those two, even as an adult, I'm still trying to cope with. Like, how can you explain to your parents that you blaming me, but you're not trying to listen to the problem, you're not trying to find out what it's like, it's always your fault. I mean, that's, that's how I see my home. Anyway, there's my, so my mom, she was hard to talk to. My dad, he wasn't there, because he was more the provider, he had to work two or three jobs, right. And he was a tough man, he just came home and beat you. And that was it. He didn't have time to do anything else. You know, he felt that anything bad he’ll beat you. And he’ll go to sleep and just punish you while he go to sleep, you know, so home was not a great place to be.
Interviewer 10:46
So then what happened? Tell us more, then, your story, continue your story forward…what happened after primary school?
Samuel 10:55
While I was in elementary school, my mom took me to some doctor, named [Dr. Lowman]. So I think between the age of eight, and nine, I went to this doctor, Dr. Lowman, his office was located in Trinidad on Montello Street, and it wasn't until to a year or two or a year ago, that I started to grasp, the sexual assault that he was doing to me. He was putting his finger inside my rectum. And that was something I always blocked out in my memory. You know, that that early part of that- I guess, childhood child situation when going to the doctor and the doctor would always put his finger in your rectum. You know… saying he was, saying he was always checking on something. And that became, that became a problem. I never really, opened up to you know, so that was something that I just became accepting to start to talk about. Because I guess, as a child, you blocked, you have what I call, things of memory that you decided to lock out, you don't, we don't want, I don't want people to even put you in that in that in that place, or stigmatize you. So that because of that I always kept myself, you know, never opened up to that situation if it makes sense.
Interviewer 12:39
Why don’t you just take it to your next place, and then we can resume?
Samuel 12:45
Uh, it’s fine, the phone won’t cut off. [Thud] The phone won’t cut off. [Voices in background]
Interviewer 12:58
So thinking about that experience, then, what happened next? Or, what is the next stage of your life that you think… sorry, I'm just I'm trying to figure out how to transition…So then, you know, that seems like a really formative part of your childhood. What’s the next part of the story that you think you'd want to share?
Samuel 13:31
Well, this is great. The great part of this is because my elementary year started to change me when I reached Jefferson Junior high school. It became more difficult at Jefferson than I would have imagined. So in order to be accepted, I started following individuals. Ah, that was bad. That led me to do- or open my eyes to other bad behaviors pretty much, because I wanted to be accepted so bad, I just did anything to be accepted. Using marijuana, started selling what's called pills at that time. It was pills they used called BAMs and [dalayas] in the 70s, in the late 70s, early 80s, there was pills is called damn BAMs and dalayas. It was more like opium pills. So I became now involved in dealing with people who's selling drugs and using drugs in my middle school years. So those are the years that enabled me, I guess, because that's from 12, I was 13, 14, 15 those three years, project me to my high school years.
So my 13, 14, 15 years, I was following older guys who were selling drugs, holding the drugs for them, more selling, or following older guys who was selling drugs, and I was more of a holder for them. If it makes sense. I wasn't actually the seller at that time, I would be the one holding the drugs for them. And when they wanted it, they will call me and I will give it to them. For them to sell. I was more the individual, the small kid that'd be outside playing and the big guy wanted the drugs, he'll call me I'll give him the drugs and [not selling them though.]
So it wasn't later when I became older, I realized what that was, was I was considered a mule. Which I would hold the drugs. Why? If the police come, I would get locked up, he wouldn't because I'm the one that have the drugs on me. You know, so that happened between the ages of 13 to 15. When I reached high school, that's when cocaine became a... the next big thing. So from that era from the pills to the marijuana became cocaine. From cocaine, I started using what's considered PCP. When I was like 17, I started using PCP. So from high school, I'm now dealing drugs, and I’m using drugs. All of this at the same time parents are finding drugs on me, they finding the drugs in the house. We're fighting, We're going to our little family tussles- as I like to call it.
I finally left home. I ran away from home when I was in 11th grade. I only left for like six months, came back, uh, finished high school, high school—barely graduated from high school. My mom was the reason I graduated from high school because my algebra teacher was the one that was going to fail me so I wouldn't graduate. But my mom went to high school and told and told the man and said—[knocks]— if my son was failing, why you didn’t tell me my son was failing until graduation time, you should have prepared me enough time to tell my son that he was failing. So she went to the principal, they had a meeting that day, and the professor, my algebra teacher, gave me a D minus. I was able to walk because it was considered a passing grade. That's how I graduated from high school.
Upon high school, my mom put more, more, more demands on me. More demands on me. And from that—[Aside] Yeah. I’m leaving. Okay. Are you okay? Yes—So she put more demands on me: it was either go to college, go to college, go find a work. Oh, no—go to college, get out my house, and go find the work. So either I go to college or get out some will find a job. So that's why I said my home wasn't a home even from high school, from elementary school. My home wasn't a home to me at peace. Yeah, I can say that my parents, they tried all the best they could to, to raise us, but they never truly understood me. And that's what I think, to this day has been my detriment and my, my pitfalls in life. Because through the pains to the turmoils to the ups and downs, my parents never really understood me.
So from high school, I graduated high school in 1990. In 1991, was when I got my first arrest, it looked like I was always escaping juvenile problems- anything... I don't know what happened, you know, but from as soon as I turned 18, I think that's when the law just clamped—just clamped me. But it clamped me on a very strange situation. I was in college in 1991. I went to college, St. Augustine's University, and I was home. And it was January. But I know it was my second semester, I was supposed to be going into my second semester.
To make a long story short, like I can get my dates a little off, but I was on 14th and Columbia Road. While on 14th and Columbia Road, I happened to see a woman being attacked by four or five Hispanic males. And I intervene. And for my intervention, I got assaulted and was placed in the hospital. That's when my life changed for... I say eternity. That date was the date of infamy for my life because from that day on, when that situation occurred, my life has never been the same.
And it's ironic because when I flip back 30-some years later, I see that what, what my downfall is who I truly is, as a person- that has always been helpful, but never, never had that opportunity to express it. So when I tried to help that woman, I recall to myself, I think, now, and I'm still the same person trying to help people. And I get that from my mother. It wasn't until my mom’s death that I heard all the wonderful things about how my mom was helpful and how she was willing. And I see that this is—my helpfulness has always—I guess it's my downfall. My kindness has always been my pitfall. Because all these friends that I tried to help were the ones who always brought me down.
This is, so, this is why I'm not really good at trying to find friends or want friends because every time I have, I do something good, something bad, has always occurred. And this is what I always see happens in my life, that when I try to help, something bad come out of it. You know? You know, I wonder. It’s like, why? You know? It's painful. Excuse me, it's painful.
Because from that day, I was just an innocent person, you know I was just trying to help someone. And from that night, it all went bad. And it has been bad since 1991, has been bad. It's been, just this has been bad. And it's 2021. And I'm still suffering from that 1991 situation. This is, that 1991 is the reason all of my arrests, all of my situations have occurred. Because when I was trying to help, no one helped me to rectify the wrong. Because when I got when, when that, when that situation occurred, they said that they found drugs on me, but they never investigated to see whether—because they beat me up and put me in a coma for two days—that they, they planted drugs on me. No one wanted to even help or to do—the public defender, the courts, police, nobody. To them it was just the end of the story- just a black man and drugs involved. End of story. And that's what my life's been- just been the end of the story. Put it in the statistics, put it on books, send them off away, send to prison, never find out. Did he get help? Does he need help? Any of this has never been a factor in my life. It’s always been a statistic. Just put it down on paper. This is what he is.
“To them it was just the end of the story- just a black man and drugs involved. End of story. And that’s what my life’s been- just been the end of the story. Put it in the statistics, put it on books, send them off away, send to prison, never find out. Did he get help? Does he need help? Any of this has never been a factor in my life. It’s always been a statistic. Just put it down on paper. This is what he is.”
Interviewer 22:52
Can you talk a little bit more about that point? That feeling like at that point, the way that you're treated—or thought about—is just, “send him off, and put him away.” Just around how the system treats people, or treats people like not like people, I'm wondering if you have some thoughts about that.
Samuel 23:21
The, from that day… uh when I got arrested, I got assaulted, and they technically said they arrested me for, for that. I would have hoped as a 19 year old—yeah, they would think okay, well, he's never been in trouble before with the law; let's see what's behind this. They never did it. My parents—go back to what I was saying about my parents. My parents are not familiar with the criminal system. My parents can’t help me—they don't know. You know me so when you go to your parents now, they don't know they just say well follow the lawyer because the lawyers went to school, they know what they are talking about. You don't know what you're talking about. You know you had drugs on you. I'm telling you I didn’t have drugs on me. Back and forth, back and forth.
This is how the system is to people of immigrants. My parents are afraid, they don’t know who to trust, they are expecting the courts to do the right thing, expecting these people to do the right thing. The system is unable to do the right.
Interviewer 24:45
Hello…? Samuel? Hello? Okay, you were talking about...this is how the system is. The system doesn't work.
Samuel 25:13
It doesn't, it doesn't, it doesn't. At that period of time, we're talking in the 90s, the system, wasn't in place—was in place to incarceration. The system was in place for the African American communities and immigrants to fall into the pitfalls that was set up and weren’t allowed to get back up once they fell.
My parents are not, were never involved in those type of activities—they never used drugs, was never involved in those type of things. So they’re not too knowledgeable of our criminal justice system. So if you, if you flashback to now, the laws put in the past—between 1994 until now have all been detrimental for people of color. And, you know, they've been detrimental for those people of color, or those of low income. And trying to find an able person able to help you wasn't easy, unless you had money or power.
So it's, it's not until now that people are realizing, that people have started to understand that those draconian laws that they put in place, they was systematically affecting a certain group of people. So what we're saying back then, people only admitting to today.
Interviewer 27:13
[Pause] Hello….? Okay, if you're not getting a good signal, we can also just do the audio, we don't need the video.
Samuel 27:36
So as I was trying to say—it’s more… I don't want people to think, I guess, to put it bluntly, it’s racism. You know what I mean? In my situation, I mean how I felt has been discriminatory, because from this crack cocaine situation, that I got arrested for 1995, uh and the laws that was, the sentence that was handed down, that did 15 and a half years for... they’re realizing, even during Obama term—2008 when he got elected to 2012 when he got reelected—, when he brought the reduction down, he realized that those sentences were too harsh for the, for the crime involved. And goes back to my immigration case, because I always say this. When I was, when I was convicted of my criminal case, immigration wasn't a problem, because at that time, they wasn't telling you about your immigration consequences and immigration consequences and penalties if you were found convicted.
Fast forward to—I got convicted in 1996. Fast forward 2010 there was a ruling, Padilla versus United States of America— uh, Padilla versus Kentucky, saying that you had to be informed about your immigration case prior to taking the plea agreement or being accepted but taking a plea agreement. Another one of my situations I fell into that, even that was, I wasn't able to get any help from that. You know, so many, so many missed so many…uh, I call it so many factors have just weakened me because anytime you think well some help will get you, they close the door, and that is they're not able is not able to, you're not able to receive help from, from that. So you look, you look at yourself and you say to yourself well why do I deserve this type of punishment?
What have I done to deserve this? I've never killed. Never. I've never robbed anybody. I've never done anything detrimental to someone's life. All I've ever done is harm myself. All I've ever done is harm myself and never received any help until I went to prison. I went to prison, that's when you start receiving these drug programs, conflict resolution programs, anger management programs, these types of courses that enable you to find or bring yourself into understanding what you're going through, if—to cope with some of your problems.
They say, they say some people—military suffers from PTSD. How about the average people? You know, don't we suffer from PTSD too from the trauma we've been through, not having people to be there for us, especially as a small child, when those are your vulnerable years, you know? And then as an adult, now, people don't have no mercy for you. So when I look at the criminal justice system, I don't expect the criminal justice system now to help me because they look, they look at you now as an adult, as someone with a rife plan and a rifle thought plan.
But they don't look at you and say, well, have this person ever received any help during this period—has he ever received qualified help, you know what I mean, to be able to cope with his problems? That I was made to deal with his childhood because most- all of my problems, I see as an adult now at 49 years of age, became when I became from six to 12. Because that directed me to a path that I had nobody to talk to, nobody to help, my family, in the course—nobody, it was nobody there for you, for me.
Interviewer 32:25
One question this makes me think about is what are some of the things people might assume about you, given your history? And how is that different from how you see yourself, as someone who was in prison for a crack-related offense?
Samuel 32:46
The good thing I can say about my [unintelligible] is drugs affect every home now. I can see it in America, drugs is not what it used to be a taboo. The opium, the opium epidemic, and what's happening in America has opened so many people's eyes to drugs, to drug problems. So to me now, I don't think, I don't think drug is a stigma of negativity. I think what people are trying to understand is, what's the difference between opium and crack cocaine?
I think people would see me not as that they will see me as how they... as how I view them- like how I encounter you. Your perception of me, you’d never know I've been arrested. You’d never know I'd been in immigration, you know? So it's how I come off to you. And the way I come off to people would be what I'm—my natural being. I'm always helpful. I'm always willing to help you. That is my natural being. This is what people get when they see me. I always try my best even through all the hell I've been through and doing it. I always try to make someone's day, try to make—better someone. You know, that little program that I was trying to create, a mentoring to work organization, to help enable youth with something that I realized was lacking in my life, was, uh, therapy—
Three components: working, counseling, and mentoring, someone, a big brother, big sister to be able to be there for you. Three components. Because without those three components, it's difficult for someone out of a bad situation to come out of it. You know what I mean? You need, you need a job because you need to pay your bills. Therapy helps you find out what's, what is deep inside you that you haven’t been able to face, we all have something that we hide inside. Well, I did start to realize that most people have things that they don't want to talk about. So how do you bring that out? And no therapist brought that out of me, it just came from me, realizing the pain I had. Something was, something has, something had to bothered me, something had to have caused me to change the direction to that I never went back to the right path, you know? Something cause me to use drugs to become stolen drugs, to sell drugs to be able to use drugs, but not to be able to be a harm to someone. If it makes sense, you know what I mean? I never forced people to use drugs, I just sold drugs to people that wanted drugs if that makes sense. You know, so people see me as who I present myself to. I present myself as someone caring, understanding, and to my family, I'm loving. So that's how people will view me. Now, if they hear see the history, they realize, Oh, this man has some serious problems. Now how they view those problems depend on the individuals, because we all read a book, but we get different definition of it, understanding of it.
Interviewer 36:25
Can you talk a little bit more about the program that you mentioned that you started, helping youth?
Samuel 36:31
I started, I started the program Mentoring to Work. I was using two guys, my uh, Jerome and Haven, as two of my closest comrades, as far as my mentors I wanted to help these individuals with. What it entailed was going into the community into our, into our community, where we all sold drugs, where we all hung out and getting the youth from out that community.
And bringing that youth out of that community in one of two ways. Either he's going to school, or he's trying to look for a job, or he wants to go into a trade. And welcoming into them and letting them know these three components: the mentoring, therapy, and the job or school is what's needed to make your life better.
Because without those three components, each one of us has some type of adversity in those communities that have occurred to us. Your brother has been killed, mom's on drugs—something has occurred to each one of us, in those communities, those black communities. And we're not having right answers to help them because there's no one to talk to. You look at you look at those black communities and you look at your uncle and you say to your uncle, “oh, uncle, something is troubling me.” Nine out of ten uncles will give you a gun or a knife and say go kill him.
That's not the answer you're looking for. That’s not the answer you want to hear. Yeah, I don't need you to give me a gun or a knife. I’m telling you someone did something to me. I need someone to sit me down and put me in the right direction, not put me back in the path that I don't need to be. And sometimes this is what happens to these communities. A child, a woman get raped. And the mother blames her for being raped. Doesn't ask why. Asks what did you do for the man to rape you? What dress did you have on?
That's what the therapy does. That's what the mentoring does… you know, I've been down that road. I've been a victim, not only not only of this, but I've been the victim of my people, my family who wasn't there to be able to help me. You can be a victim more than once. You know, and this is what the program was based on. Those three components. Because as, me as an adult, when I founded it, understood that it's not bad having someone to talk to—it's just bad the people you talk to, every person you talk to don't give you the right answers. You have people who mean well, but just give you bad answers… doesn't mean that's the right person to talk to. [Laughs] You know what I mean?
Therapy is going to give me someone that helps you navigate your answers, navigate your problem. You know not someone says “Oh sis, I'm having a problem this man raped me.” Oh, girl, just go have sex with them. Or wow, “I'm having a problem—” Hit this joint! Man go get high! Forget about that problem. Yeah. Those are not the answers we're looking for. That's not the answer you're looking for. This is what this problem is. This is what hurts our community. This is what hurts us. This is what had hurt me for my whole entire 47 years—is not having the right person to talk to, to get the right answers.
Yeah, I've always worked. Yeah. But I didn't have a mentor. So out the three components I had one, I went to school. Yeah, I've always had a job. Yeah. But the other two I lacked in. And that didn't make me whole. It didn't make me whole. To be whole, you need those three. It's like a triangle. It’s like a pyramid. You need those three to make you who you are, you know, some people. Sounds easy, but it’s not. Who has time to be a mentor? To be able to answer those phone calls at two o’clock in the morning? See what's going on. Talk to me.
Interviewer 40:46
When did you start this program, Samuel?
Samuel 40:50
2017.
Interviewer 40:51
So where were you before then?
Samuel 40:55
I was, I was in DC. I was—in 2012. Let me rewind for you again. From 1990 to 2012 I was in federal prison. And from federal prison, I was released in 2012. No, 2010. Yeah, was released 2010. Uh, I went to immigration 2010 to 2012. So immigration kept me for two years, I was in immigration for two years 2010 to 2012.
Interviewer 41:33
How did you get out of the immigration prison?
Samuel 41:35
My country, Sierra Leone, West Africa, wrote a letter to Homeland Security, clearly stating that I was not a citizen of their country. I was not. They don't recognize me as a, as a citizen, or as a, as a citizen of their country. And that—upon that letter, I was released in May of 2012.
That's how I was released from immigration because from May—from January 2010, to May of 2012. They was trying to deport me. And they were in...that I was filing….I went to the immigration...I won my, my immigration case, but the so called board, board of… what is it? BOA?
Interviewer 42:25
BIA, Board of Immigration Appeals.
Samuel 42:27
Yeah, they, they, they recanted the victory the judge gave me and, and ruled in favor of the government, which put me in removal processing. So I won the case by Judge, and then I lost it under the BIA.
Interviewer 42:47
So then what was your interaction with immigration after you were released from detention?
Samuel 42:51
That's, that's the, that's the two part question. Immigration they’re so, I call it so sneaky. This is why people hate ICE. I was released under federal custody. Immigration gave me what's considered minimal supervision because they knew I was under what's called intense probation period. I was under federal probation for approximately 20 something months. But because I was on the federal, intense federal probation period, the immigration figured they had more people to supervise, so they gave me what was considered the minimal—I report once a year. So for three years, they allowed me to do that. So from 2012, when I came all the way to 2017, that was allowed to report, but to 2017, they came to me—2017 or 2018, I think 2018, they came to me and said, my country has changed.
At that time, I didn't know what the hell they was talking about. But then I realized now, they was talking about the election, and the old president had left. So that letter that they said that I had was no longer valid. So they said that they're working on deporting me, so they put me on the ankle bracelet. And they gave me what's called intensive supervision. I had to go to this place in Vienna, Virginia, once a week, sometimes twice a week, sometimes three times a week, three times originally. Until they reduced it from twice a week to once a week for two years. Until they finally deported me.
That's when they arrested me and deported me on July 31, 2019.
“Because it just, it just made you more, made you feel like a criminal. That ankle bracelet made me feel—I felt less than human being. Everywhere I go, I had to report that I have an ankle bracelet on if I went to certain buildings, they had metal detectors or security, I had to inform them that I had this on because it would go off. I was restricted on my movement, I couldn’t go no more than 16 miles away from my home. If I moved anywhere, any, any far I had to inform them where I was going, I had to get approval. I missed my brother’s wedding he had in Seattle, Washington, I wasn’t allowed to go.”
Interviewer 44:47
Can you talk a little bit more about being on an ankle bracelet?
Samuel 44:52
Well, if if, if I can be a dog, I can tell you that’s the worst feeling ever. Because it just, it just made you more, made you feel like a criminal. That ankle bracelet made me feel—I felt less than human being. Everywhere I go, I had to report that I have an ankle bracelet on if I went to certain buildings, they had metal detectors or security, I had to inform them that I had this on because it would go off. I was restricted on my movement, I couldn't go no more than 16 miles away from my home. If I moved anywhere, any, any far I had to inform them where I was going, I had to get approval. I missed my brother’s wedding he had in Seattle, Washington, I wasn't allowed to go.
It was a, it was a very discomfortable feeling. But through it all, I maintained, I tried to maintain.. my as they say, my energy, I tried to continue my program, my mentoring to work program, I tried to even with that, but I just kept it very minimal to what I could do. Because I felt very—it was it was just uncomfortable walking with the, with the bracelet on me, it felt very unnatural.
So in certain schools that I would have to go to I had to, you know, I was fearful of going because you know, when you go inside schools, they had no detectors, you have to form them. So they like well, who are you to come in and help mentor someone when you had an ankle bracelet. So it's like a stigma, you know, and you can't just, you don't want to tell people your whole life history at a metal detector. So you just, you know, just kept going- ignored it. So these things affected me. In the end, I still have nightmares or, I call it, I still feel like that ghost feeling on my ankle still, because of how long it’s been and how tight it was on my ankle. So I still have those type of feelings. Sometimes I find myself rubbing my ankles to see if it's still there. You know? Yeah, it was… and then the way they took it off, it was just like it was meaningless. They just snapped it off and threw it on the corner. But yet it has so much meaning we had on my ankle. You know, when you took it off, it was just a piece of plastic. You cut it off with scissors and you flung it, you know, it was so it just made me feel just so less than man like, all this time you put this stuff in my arm, but you took it off my ankle, like it was nothing like it was just paper, waste of paper. You know, but that's the mental, the mental psychology that these, these institutions put on and that that mental stuff- that mental thing… that's why I say therapy is such a—it goes deep into your head.
That ankle bracelet, it wasn't just a physical part, it was that mental part. And when they took it off my ankle, and I watched him just throw it away like it was nothing. I said you guys know how to play with our minds. You guys know how to play with our minds. Seriously. You know the up and down, up and down, up and down. Call you here. You better be here before we rescue... all this. All this, I call it mental anguish they run on to keep you unbalanced. Mental psychology… the mental psychology game that they play on you. You know it's just, it was just mind boggling.
It means nothing to you guys, how you guys treat us. It means nothing, absolutely nothing. Forme, for ICE, it meant nothing to them. For them, they’re doing a job. Forget about your family, forget you been in America all these years. Forget you know, what you're what you're trying to do? What had happened to you? Hey, we have a job to do. And that's all it is.
And that's to me that's, that's the most damaging thing—that mental psychology they played on my head. You know, for those two years they put that bracelet on my ankle—that mental thing the anguish they put on my, on my head will last an eternity, will last until I die.. you know… because it's meaningless. It means nothing to them. You know.
And I would hope that, I would think that our lives have more value than what.. uh you know they say it doesn't. I would hope, but it really doesn't. It really doesn’t. Our lives don't have no meaning to them. It's sad because it's like my, my, my probation—my immigration officer, [Medic.] I thought he was trying to help me. One day he said, he said this. He said this. I'll never forget what he said to me. He said, “My job is to deport you.” That’s it. That is my only job is to deport you. I don't care nothing else. My job is just to deport you.
Interviewer 50:27
He said that?
Samuel 50:28
Yeah, he said that Mr. Medic. And what’s agonizing, what's so hurtful is I thought this man was a caring man. He fooled me so much. I’ll never forget that day. He had me speak to my, uh in the office—he said my job is to deport you. That is my job. My only job is to deport you, Mr. Anthony. I don't care about nothing else. That is my sole job is to deport you. That’s how it is. That’s how it is. We’re nothing. We’re just throw away. We’re nothing. It means nothing to them. We mean we need absolutely nothing to them… how they sleep at night god only knows… it means nothing to them—my job is just to deport you. Put you on the plane and get you the hell away from America. That’s it. That’s all I have, that’s all I—however I do it—however, I lie, cheat, steal to do it, it’s none of your business, but my job is to get you out this country.
When he stated that, that, that resonated in my head continuously, and I told my attorney what he said. That's it he's trying to deport I told my attorney that. I felt the windows closing on me. I felt it, and that July 31, 2019 they closed so hard on me it was ridiculous.
I went to report like I normally do today so-called these hidden offices that they have us go to… it was ran by one of these third party organization—I don't know if you're familiar with it, they have these third party organization that they that they give contracts to, to supervise us using, using the ankle bracelet. So we report to them they call it the “intensive something something,” I even forgot the stupid name now. So they use them, so for two years these people had me on a string. They would call me any minute—we need you to office. And I had to drop what I'm doing going straight to his office. Just a ploy.
I mean, they don’t care if I'm working—you know, just go. We need you at our office. We need you to be here in two hours. It is just mind boggling the way they treat you, and they was doing it systematically now, I realize just to find a reason to arrest you, just to find a reason, they was just toying with you to find the reason to arrest you. So that day they arrested me; they knew they couldn't give me in no other way. But when they, when they finally got approval to arrest me, that was when they arrested me and it took a while—four people to arrest me.
Me!? No valid history—my nothing, but you brought four officers to arrest me inside of my, my, my schedule appointments? I came to my appointment, and you still came for going in with four officers to physically, physically restrain me, but yeah, that is life… this life is my life... this is what happens.
“Yeah, he said that Mr. Medic. And what’s agonizing, what’s so hurtful is I thought this man was a caring man. He fooled me so much. I’ll never forget that day. He had me speak to my, uh in the office—he said my job is to deport you. That is my job. My only job is to deport you, Mr. Anthony. I don’t care about nothing else.”
Interviewer 53:53
When you say that they brought you..they called you in to just check in, and they had the four agents there to arrest you?
Samuel 54:02
No. One week prior to that, one week prior to that they called me, I came July 31. I think it was after—because my sister's birthday is like a week before mine, so I think it was on the 7th, or something like that. So they called me, they called me a week and a half prior to that. They just called me and said we need you in the office. So they called me into the office. So I thought that they, that they probably was planning then to arrest me, but something must have triggered it because it was a late call. You know, so I got there like around three. I think it was too late for them. You know to round off, so on my following next appointment was when they was ready for me.
Because I'm coming from DC in traffic, so I was able to, I got there late because they gave me two hours and they called me at like one, and I got there only around 2:30 close to my, so close to the deadline because it was rush hour, you know. So then my next appointment was July 31 on a Wednesday it was when they, when they was ready for me. Because they knew that I always came to my appointment on time, and I was early, always like the first two people there. So they knew that I would be there quite early. I wasn’t one of those person that'd be there late in the afternoon. So—because they've been watching me, you know, you've been, you've been reporting to these people for two years. So they report, they know you, they know your schedule, you know, they, they know it better than you might think they know. They don't say, so they knew that I would be there because everything was logged, everything was systematic, then I have the ankle bracelet on me and they would track, you know, my movement.
So they knew that I was on the route to them anyway, because they can see for my GPS on ankle bracelet. So they knew I was so they… so nothing I did those three years they was not intimately informed about. So it's just them getting their approval, because in ICE, you have to have signed off, you have to sign off certain things I've learned when, whenever someone signed off on that, on that arrest warrant, you know, because I was technically not, I never violated my supervision. Yet someone had to sign off, I never validated my supervision. They had no reason to revoke my supervision.
But according to them, they had my, my travel documents, they insisted on having my travel documents, which to them, cause... what is the called? Just cause to get the warrants because they had my travel documents.
Interviewer 56:35
Got it. And so then what happened after that were you put into ICE detention?
Samuel 56:42
Yes. I was sent to detention at not Farmville—another one, they had in Virginia. And from there, they sent me on one whirlwind spin. They flew me from there to Texas, hoping to deport me from Texas on the what’s called an ICE plane in August. So they had like a two-week window to give us a schedule to deport all of us Africans they call us, you know, in Texas, to deport us to Texas. This two week window, so August 13, they were hoping to deport us.
So they flew me to Texas. I went to like Alabama, Louisiana, Atlanta, and then Texas, this so called big detention center, very deep, deep in Texas. And that's where they tried to fly me out of. But Fabian and Sarah was able to get a stay of deportation. And I wasn't deported at that time. But four months later, I was deported in December 13, 2019.
“I can never see Sierra Leone as my home because I know nothing about this country.”
Interviewer 57:55
So now that you have been, you're in Sierra Leone…Do you have thoughts about what makes you think of as home? Like what do you think of as home, or being forced to leave the place that you see as your home?
Samuel 58:14
I can never see Sierra Leone as my home because I know nothing about this country.
So all of my thoughts, all of my memories, everything is there with you in America. It’s not- I have no ties to this country. But according to the world, the place that I was born, if it makes sense, but that doesn't identify who I am. I consider myself an American. I went to school there. I was raised there. My ideology, my demographics, my way of thinking, the way I talk, it’s all American. There is nothing about me besides, they say I was born here, or my appeal that I'm from Sierra Leone, it’s nothing.
Yeah, it's that type of... it’s another form of depression. And it goes back to another form of when I say—I'm getting my life together, trying to do the right thing, everything's working well, and then all of a sudden, somebody…. I was a CDL driver. I was working. I was making good money. I was doing Uber on my part-time. I had a home, bought a new car, just all the things for someone planning a life and then all of a sudden one day they come and get you. So that's what I got left. I left behind life. The life I had, you know?
Yeah. And I guess people ask me this all the time, I guess is what the reason why I never really truly got married or found love because from the time I came home from prison, I've always been unbalanced. I've never been a person... sister is married [unintelligible] all the time, but I've never been a person that’s always been on level ground. My ground has always been shaky. Every time I call something, something always occurring in my life, something's shaking, it's never been a stable ground. And it really came into fruition on December, July 31, but I always used to tell her, I said, I'm not normal, I might as well- it, I’m not normal, Interviewer, no one in immigration is living a normal life.
I said, I'm on eggshells. These people can come and get me anytime they want. I’m on eggshells. I've never acted out from 2012, when they let me out, to 2019, seven years, they gave me an America. All that time they've been working to try and get rid of me, they never stopped. I'm the one that might, they might or they, they let me go.
Because I'm thinking well, it's all over, but unbeknownst to me, they was just waiting for, you know, this country to change over, you know, because probably last administration wasn't suitable to their needs.
So when this country when it's changed over, it became suitable to their needs. To me, I don't know if it's true, they just paid for me to come. They just pay me, I'll pay them off. And this country is full of corruption. You know, they talk about Ukraine, all these other countries full of corruption, but it when it works to American benefit, it's not corruption, you know? So when you get the travel documents, fraudulently, or however you got it, you consider it- you know, it wasn't legal the way you got it. You didn't receive it in a legal format, but yet, you received it, but it's still under corruption.
Interviewer 1:02:06
Can you talk about that a little bit more, the travel document piece of it?
Samuel 1:02:10
The United States—uh during, during uh, the uh Bush—during the Trump era, when I was inside immigration for six months, I was inside immigration. I learned about travel documents—because remember 2010 to 2012, they never was never able to get the travel documents from me. So I never really got to understand to see your travel documents to see what exactly what it was. In my life, my whole entire... I never knew what the hell a travel document was. So to actually be placed in a situation that I had to start doing my research. And that's when people, my African counterparts kept telling me how America made up these, these struggles. You know, how they was, you know, because here we're thinking, you know that America is such a good country, they won’t do certain things because of the image that we all think of America. But behind the secret doors, this is what they do to get rid of you, you know?
Because [exasperated sigh] if there’s no voice telling you this, then who would you believe? They go back and say you believe this criminal? You believe a criminal? Over an American, a great American? You think we would lie about something like that? And this is the propaganda of the, of the world. Because you mighty, you think you won't do wrong, you won't do bad? But that's why I think people don't realize how America is shifting, and people are realizing, America’s not, America does a lot of bad.
You know, but people are waking up slowly, but they're not waking up as quickly as we need to. Because every day during, during that Trump era lives was being taken away from what I call illegal tactics. Well if you and me do it, we’ll go to jail, but if the country do it, we're doing it for the safety and protection of our country. You know, if it makes sense to people, they may not understand it because when they do it, well we're protecting our citizens. We're getting rid of these criminals.
But for, for us to do it—you come to America with the illegal documents, you’re going to jail. Where you get this document from? You know, you come with a fake visa what happens to you? But yet they can ship you out to another country with fake visa because they paid for them, they paid for them to accept you.
This is the dilemma that we face, but who will believe us? You’re damn criminal—you're a criminal. You're a worthless criminal. You never got anything positive in your life besides [unintelligible]. So who will believe you? This is the problem people faces. This is why I say this... help is not where it should be. Because who in office will tell, would admit that, “Yeah, we behave in these fashions.” No one in Homeland Security would ever come on and say it- lose, lose your pension? Lose your life work? You will admit to… which deportation officer will admit to that…. lose your pension? Are you crazy? You your safety blanket for your wives and your kids? For a immigrant? Are you crazy? For worthless immigrant? You will, you will come out and say that? It won't happen. You're not losing your pension for that. For a worthless immigrant to get a visa to this country, right? You got your home, your wife your kids to deal with- what are you going to do? Are you going to admit to that? Are you crazy? You not going to admit to that.
It’s the brotherhood. Brotherhood… it’s like, it's like Black Lives Matter, what they going through—fake police paperwork, like the guy that did that fake police paperwork. If they, they say the guy from Minnesota he died from—he had a cardiac arrest. It wasn't till the video came out. They had to do the whole report saying he lied on the police report. But to us, they never lie. Oh my God. No. But it shows you, they were lying. But who will believe us? That’s the problem. We can talk until our ears turn blue. You still a criminal.
If George Floyd didn’t have a video, that police report would have been what the reason of his death would have been. Same thing to that police report that happened to that case in Florida or something. Yeah. When it just came out, the guy—the police all got fired. You know. But the benefit always goes to them—they’re professionals.
Why would an ICE officer lie that he didn't receive these, these travel documents accurately? Why? Why would he lie? This man is a service worker, a long term worker, he's not a, a politician. He's a career, a career officer. Yeah, that's the word they call them, a career officer. He would never lie to get their travel documents. No! He’s an honest man.
This is… This is why people don't want to put the apples and oranges together. Because they know it’s apples and apples. It’s nothing different. In a fake police report; in a fake travel document. There’s nothing different. Same way a cop will lie about something. The man told me himself! “My job is to deport you.” And not only to me to many different other individuals...not only to me, but to many, many others. They systematically made these documents, especially to those ones- they call those ICE planes, that they fly all over to these different countries and drop you off, right on the tarmac and fly off. It don’t even refuel, they just go… they go to, they call it a… a friendly country to refuel. You don’t refuel in unfriendly countries. So they refuel only in friendly countries that they have bases in. Their planes only refuel in those countries because they don't want to be attacked while they on the tarmac.
It's a, it's a story of pressures, the story of so many twists and turning. But in the end, I have a fault to blame. But my fault is only as limited to my knowledge. And my knowledge was, I was too young to ask for help at a young age, and because of that I spiraled into a life of drug abuse, alcohol, and selling drugs, and criminal behavior. That is my, that is my responsibility. Those are my actions. But what about the actions of those who were supposed to be there to do the right thing?
What about all those people that never, ever considered... the judges to all of these now, they just- now everything now- is just slowly but surely, one of two situations is coming out, you know how corrupt or how unjust things are systematically, things were put in place to affect a certain group of people? Because they don't use the word racism, they use systematic injustice….
“I don’t want to be the casualties of war. I want the American government to realize that I fell into every agenda you’ve ever put into place. Every agenda - from the crack law to immigration law, every law you put in place. I fell into it since I’ve been, since I came to your country.”
Interviewer 1:10:34
That's a good lead into the last question. So you know, one of the people we talked to said this thing about how the system never lets you go, like, “how much punishment do you think is enough for one person? How much punishment can one person hold?”
Samuel 1:10:59
Exactly. That's a terrific statement. Like, how much is enough? How much? When can you, when can the government learn to forgive? When is your second chance? When are you going to get the second chance? They tell you all the second chance talk. So how much is too much? How much is, is, is too much? I mean, how much punishment are you as the government willing to go to give? Because in the end, you supposed to have what's considered, uh, I call a second chance at life. You supposed to have that opportunity that, okay, you, you, you've done your time, you've done your sacrifice. We know injustice was done to you. We're trying to change the draconian laws that put you under this situation. But you're not, you're not going to get the benefit of it. Yeah, you’re not going to get benefit of it. So you can change as you continue… You're just what's considered, what we call, the casualties of war.
And this is where I don't want to be. I don't want to be the casualties of war. I want the American government to realize that I fell into every agenda you've ever put into place. Every agenda - from the crack law to immigration law, every law you put in place. I fell into it since I've been, since I came to your country.
Yeah, I met my my wrong. And I'm sorry for that. But as a country that says, you know, you're turning a new page. Don't leave me out, don't say, well, you're not going to get the help. Don’t leave me and say, well, you’re not going to help. I deserve the help. Because for every, every wrong I've endured, I've got back up and tried to do better. I've got back up to try to do better. I've got back up to try to do better. So because of that, I need this. I need this opportunity. Don't leave me out to say, and just say well, you're just a casualty of war, you just have to accept that. I can't. Because I don't deserve it. Because every, every things you put in place to affect the so-called systematic injustice, I’ve become a victim of. I’ve become a victim of it. You know? Well yeah, I fall, I get back up. I fall, I get back up I fall, I get back……
You kept me under this for two years, watch me everywhere I went, everything I did. You couldn't get nothing to arrest me. You knew I was not doing anything. I was living a normal life. Providing for my family, [unintelligible]. But you impacted my life because you always stay in the back of my brain. And this is what's called psychological imprisonment. It’s worse than physical imprisonment. This is, this is so difficult to deal with, psychological imprisonment. The head is so difficult to deal with. Because everything you know, everybody you care about, everything done, It's a one part of the world- your head. And it leaves you just…. go deal with it.
That’s, that’s … when is punishment too much. You’d be happy for me to kill myself please. Well, so be it. How many people have killed themself because of that? The weight of the world has been too much and just killed themself because it was too much. How many lives must suffer before the understanding is pain they doing is just too much? How many lives must you sacrifice to reach your common goal… whatever goal the American government is trying to reach? How many lies, how many lies must you tell...you know? For, for, for officer, so-called an officer- a so-called officer to tell you his sole job attributed to- then you realize his badge when it says Immigration and Customs Enforcement. You hear that word, “enforcement.” There's no sympathy in that. There's no empathy in that. It's just strictly harsh words: “enforcement.”
How many times you've seen in New York and Pennsylvania, they go to these jobs and just arrest people, by force, drag them out? Those shopping malls. That these companies had to put a moratorium on it because they kept affecting their work productivity. The so-called plants that have hired so many Latinos, you know, these plants they had to put a moratorium because they said our workers not coming to work because they're afraid you're gonna come raid the place. So they had to go to the so called councilmembers and congressmen to tell them listen, “if you don’t stop raiding us, then you’re not going to have no workers.” So the government stopped raiding people. How many of those raids affected people's lives? They were the sacrifice. Now the ones who keep the jobs…it's not fair. It’s not fair. How bout all those ones that was working and doing the right thing every day? Going to they work, and you went in there and all of a sudden, you arrested them by the hundreds. One time they said they arrested 1000 or 700 people in two states, or one state, they arrested several 700 people. ICE officers!? ICE officers, you arrest 700 people under immigration… 700 people and you go home and sleep at night for what? Because they came to work? If they were drug dealers or criminals, why would they go to work? Why would they be at work?
But you call them criminals. And you arrest them, because they went to a plant? Where we had warrants for the arrest because they came to the country illegally. I had a green card, but you call me a criminal? I came… you tell me I came in your country illegally. I'm an alien. But you gave me a green card! I have a green card. So where do I fit in your, in your equation now? I didn't come into the country illegally. I don’t want you guys want to say I lied and smuggled into your country. You knew I was in your country, but you made laws to affect me You know…? It’s that…. it’s not that… it’s a call from the home that I have… you say wow this guy has a happy home, but for one person life to be put under so much [unintelligible]. We’re gonna [unintelligible] because time for help. And help should have been there….way they try now to help kids….
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